Interhive Report
One of the most frightening experiences ever has just happened over by the Slime Sewer district! Genestealers have been spotted!!! Just a little while ago The Warmongers assured us that they had wiped out the Genestealer band that was lurking out there, now we learn that there may be many more. It happened when two relatively new gangs, The Nine and The Neon Nerfherders a Van Saar gang, were hunting Khaines Inquisitors. They heard a noise like chittering and suddenly The Genestealers were charging out of the surrounding pipes! A quick alliance was agreed upon and the fight was on! Early on the gangs were scared, and rightly so!, and simply blazed away at the stealers whenever they could. After a couple of gangers were beaten the Genestealers began to become more confident of facing the power of the gangs weaponry and began to charge through open ground. Some of the Deathwalkers were able to gun down some Genestealers, as were The Nine. Necrofeeliac's ,of The Nerfherders, men had worse luck, culminating with Ryan the Rectum Rammer pulling the pin on his frag grenades whenever Genestealers had him in close combat, he did this two separate times! But in the end all of the gang members fell before the Genestealers, and though most recovered two were captured and another had his head torn off. The Guilders are offering a 280 credit bounty on any Genestealers-alive or dead. We now go to Petoir Jen-engs who has actually snuck down to talk with Khaine's Inquisitors about this battle.
Petoir: I am now sneaking towards their new temple, I think I see a guard.
Rotte: What in Khaines name?!! We are being invaded again brethren!!
Petoir: No wait! I am from InterhiAHHHHHHHHH!!! They're shooting at me!!!
Flaya: Gun him down in the name of Khaine!!!!
Guul: Forward my warriors teach them to fear the night!!
Petoir: Wait!!! I'm not armed Aggghhhhhh!!
Guul: Excellent shot my dark knights!! Now finish him!!!!
Marrowe: I kill you!!!!!
Petoir: acck, (gasp) help me, I can't crawl away fast................
Marrowe: Know the glory of Khaine!!!! (Chainsword starting)
Petoir: ............please I'm innocent............help............NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Marrowe: Hey I lasted through the battle!!!!!!
Guul: Praise to Khaine! Now let's eat him.
We here at Interhive reports would like to say that Petoir managed to crawl off and has equipped himself with a bionic leg, though he's still missing three fingers, and plans to continue bringing you an up close and personal look at all the local gangs!
Hello again! It is I, the mighty Warmonger!!! I promised ta share me views on pistals and shotguns dis issue, I will also discuss my hiring strategies!!!! Yay! Fist d ings first - da pistol is a lethal weapon, up close, for wit it even an unskilled juve has a good chance of hitting! Dey are also cheep an\rquote ya don\rquote t hafta pay much for em! I like da reliability o' da lazpistol but da power o' da bolt can't be denied! Den dere iz da shotgun, use it like a street-sweeper, it helps discourage juves and gangers from sticking together, I also get great enjoyment from da hotshot rounds, he-he-he.........don't make fun of my laff!!!. Now wen hireing a gang I suggest ignoring all dem juves AND heavies. Juves are annoying and hardly worth what ya pay for dem, and heavies, well if you get dem I\rquote d only give them special weapons-da heavy weapons are expensive and ya can\rquote t move and shoot dem in a quick manner. I have personally killed a heavy while he wuz trying ta move and DEN shoot he-he-he...................................SHUTTUP!!!! I KILL DIS RECORDER SMASH! ..........Hate you dumb ding CRACK! Dumb stoopid........ I GET GUN BLAM!!..........................................................
Next time(if we can replace the recorder) Warmonger will consider the dilemma of whether to use a Hired Gun.
Greetings and salutations you wretched pot of pond-scum, I Hedrar Dral Once again bring you news of what you can do for The Guilders. But first I would like to take this time to congratulate Snake and his bounty hunting gang of Delaques and Henrik Wolf. Most of you morons don't know Henrik, he is a bounty Hunter who just moved here to The Screaming Tower sector from Last Hope Outpost. He claimed Last Hope was becoming too laid back and has come here seeking adventure, he has already gu nned down a couple small scavvy and outlaw gangs and helped Snake in an assault against the heretic Khaine worshippers! I am happy to report we have chased them from their temple and are now setting down to dismantling the accursed thing. In other news Daggoth and Ettin are still at large and we are still offering massive bounties for them, second we are about to receive a massive laser weapon shipment and are looking for a skilled and discreet gang to aid in guarding it. For these and other jobs inquire at your local Guilder station. Remember-We get rich for You!
The Bar With No Name is a quiet, peaceful and restful inn where people would sooner step on your face as look at you and there is at least three murders a day. But it is a good place to find skilled people to hire to work for you. Perhaps the best one ar ound now is Duke Nukem! A powerful Pyro Wyrd he is adept at hurling fireballs and other goodies. He never goes anywhere without his custom laspistol and has a sword for close combat. Though he is not a powerful warrior his abilities make him like a heavy with multiple weapons, an excellent find for only a 25 credit hire fee.
It was a misty and cold day when The Nine found themselves locked in battle with the powerful Genestealers. The Fixer wasn\rquote t scared though and with the aide of Rotte, a Deathwalker who has yet to finish a battle still standing but has remarkable luck in avoiding injuries, ran to a tower practically point-blank with the onrushing Steale rs. His mighty stubber barked out a quick rat-a-tat-tat but the Stealers slipped in past him and clambered up the tower. Rotte turned in time to see a Stealer leap off a ladder at the mighty Fixer. Appearing rather annoyed that he had missed The Fixer hurled his heavy stubber at the Stealer and yanked out a knife, meeting it's charge head-on. But it was his head that was torn off and hurled aside as the Stealer lunged towards Rotte. However all is not lost as The Nine have hired an even more intimidating heavy-Kasper!, But it is a reminder to all of us how transitory life is here in- The Hive.
The Shot of The Week AwardThe shot of the week award goes to an unknown juve working for Commodore Ryan's Cawdor gang. As Assassin of The Mad Dog soldiers c ame around a turn the juve yanked out his stub pistol and, at maximum range, cleanly shot him through the chest. Taking him out of the fight in one shot!
From The Mad Dog Soldiers: We dare Snake and hiz bounty hunters ta come after us!
From Khaines Inquisitors: Deathwalkers you damn idiots!!!!! NOT Deadmen!!!! .Even the favored of Khaine read your blasphemous news!!!
From The Warmongers: Would any other gangs be interested in helping us to hunt down a pack of Genestealers?? We really need bai......BACKUP!! (I covered . that up pretty well!)
From Slaya of Khaines Inquisitors: I vote in favor of making all buildings ground level.
From Rotte of Khaines Inquisitors: Ummmmmmmm Rotte say he eat a bad rat burger, not feel good. Make better burgers. Suggest Cawdors for burgers. Or Orlock!, we had dem once afta we cut ummmmmm his special "orgams" or someting out!
From HiveMaster Thor: I am looking for a gang brave enough to try and slow the increasing might of the scavvy boss Daggoth, hint to unskilled/new/small gangs - save yourselves and don't bother volunteering you would just be butchered, but a coalition might stand a chance.!
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